Life in Progress

"I've learned that you shouldn't be afraid to change: instead be afraid to stay where you are..If you let fear of change rule you, you will live never knowing there is a fuller life out there that is yours for taking."

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

The Pursuit of Perfection

Is it so wrong to dislike the Victoria Secrets "girls"? They represent everything the average American woman is not and tries so hard to be. With their "D" cup breasts, that never seem to sag, is that in part to the uplift bras? Or the enhancement of surgery? Either way as they walk their breasts jiggle ever so perfectly and their legs appear to be endless and flawless.

I know, you may be thinking I am jealous, possibly insecure of my own self to sit here and write this. Au contraire, you couldn't be more wrong. I am, somewhat envious of these women, who wouldn't be? However, I am more disappointed in what they represent.

Really, if we wear the underwear and fishnet hose, we will not look like they do. The "sell" is that we will look like them if we purchase their lingerie. It is common knowledge that men, and some women, enjoy the catalogs and the TV special. Why wouldn't they? Afterall, it's the closest we can get to porn in our mailbox without the brown paper wrapper and on our TV without having to subscribe to Cinemax.

What really is happening ever so non challantly now more than ever, is the pursuit of perfection. We try, through plastic surgery, miracle drugs and potions to alter our outer shell. But altering our outer shell does not change who we are. When we look in the mirror, although the reflection is different, who we have been all our life will never change.

The old expression, "you can take the girl out of the country but you can't take the country out of the girl." applies.

I imagine if the "average" woman strutted down the runway with little to nothing on no one would be particularly interested.

People that I know who have lost tremendous amounts of weight or who have had gastric bypass surgery are recommended to attend therapy. Deep inside, despite their physical alterations they are still that overweight, shy, insecure person. The attention they now may receive coupled with their new lifestyle can be overwhelming sending them spiraling into a depression. This ultimately ends up with them putting the weight back on. Afterall, the way they were before the alteration is who they will always be . They need to learn how to adapt and adjust or they will always go back to what they know.

We, despite, our imperfections have all experienced this at one time or another. Someone once said to me, "isn't it enough to accept that what you are is what you are. You work so hard to change and yet find no satisfaction and happiness. Is it possible to just celebrate and be happy with how you are?."

Maybe it would be if only the intrusion of these fallacies of perfection wouldn't be there every time we turn around.

2 Comments:

At 9:31 AM, Blogger Deb said...

Michelle, great post! In my own personal opinion, I really feel that it’s all the way a woman carries herself. Yes, the Victoria Secret girls are stunning---and believe me, those bras really make you look as though you have implants! (shhh) But, I do see your point.

They came out with these ‘new models’----(not Victoria Secret) but another company where they wanted plus size women to advertise for their underwear. Did you see this? Do you know what ‘their version’ of plus size women were? Size 8 and up. Can you believe this? So, if you step away from the children’s section of clothing, and step into the ‘women’s section’----this applies to ‘that woman’. Crazy what they now think a plus size woman is.

Let me ramble on about another aspect of beauty. It doesn’t come from the outside though. I dated a girl who was not your typical ‘beauty queen’. Oh, and believe me, the people around me reminded me of that everyday.

“Why are you dating her? She is so not your type! You can do better than her, Deb!”

Wrong. I was so in love with this woman Michelle… She was skinny, but awfully skinny. She didn’t hold herself very well, her frame was frail and her appearance was lacking somewhat. However, her beauty from ‘within’ is what I fell in love with. I fell in love with her laughter, her personality, the way she made me feel, and the emotional connection that simply told me, “Deb, you’re fricken in love girl!”

It was then, I realized that this woman was the most beautiful girl on the planet. No one was more beautiful than her---in my eyes. I was so proud to be with her, and people couldn’t fathom the thought of me being coupled up with her.

So it’s “all the way a woman carries herself”-----skinny----OR fat. There’s nothing sexier than a woman with confidence. That’s what it’s all about. Just as you can’t buy class----it comes from ‘within’…Everything comes from ‘within’.

Superficial men and women will find this out after a few years of dating that model-type image they selected. Don’t get me wrong—some beautiful people on the outside are beautiful on the inside as well, but ………….. the ones who are too focused on appearances, won’t be too focused on ‘you’.

Thanks for this eye-opening post! You always come up with new stuff, I like that a lot in a blogger.

 
At 6:14 AM, Blogger Read This said...

Deb always puts things so eloquently. Following her is like following Babe Ruth at the plate. No one will ever remember how you did. I will give it a try though. All that beauty, falsely portrayed, or at least advertised will fall by the wayside if the economy goes south. Do you think the poor folks sneaking in from Mexico really care about push up bras, and edible underwear? On Maslow's Hiearchy, most Americans have too much money and time so we worry about stuff that should not be worried about. Besides after seeing your pic and reading your blog you have all those gals beat. Intelligence combined with your look is a tough combo to beat.

 

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