For Women over 30

A friend sent this to me today...ladies and gents...what do you think???

This was written by Andy Rooney from CBS 60 Minutes. Andy Rooney says:

As I grow in age, I value women who are over 30 most of all. Here are justa few reasons why:

A woman over 30 will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think.

If a woman over 30 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And, it's usually something more interesting.

A woman over 30 knows herself well enough to be assured in who she is, what she is, what she wants and from whom. Few women past the age of 30 give a damn what you might think about her or what she's doing.

Women over 30 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you, if they think they can get away with it.

Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated.

A woman over 30 has the self-assurance to introduce you to her women friends. A younger woman with a man will often ignore even her best friend because she doesn't trust the guy with other women.

Women over 30 couldn't care less if you're attracted to her friends because she knows her friends won't betray her.

Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 30. They always know.

A woman over 30 looks good wearing bright red lipstick. This is not true of younger women.

Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 30 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.

Older women are forthright and honest. You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.

Yes, we praise women over 30 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart,well-coiffed hot woman of 30+, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year-old waitress.

Ladies, I apologize for all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milkfor free".

Here's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage, why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire Pig, just to get a little sausage.

"You'll need to sign here by the X that you read the policy on personal information and sign your name here and your intials here and there. Ok then. Go through that door and I'll meet you on the other side."

"You'll put this gown on, so undress from the waist up leave the gown open in the front and have a seat in that room, they'll call you when they are ready."

I step behind the blue colored curtain and draw it close. Remove my sweatshirt, tank top then bra, wonder why I wearing so many clothes, pull my ams through the gown and tie it in the front. I gather my articles of clothing and stuff them into my purse and head out into the room.

One other woman is there, she smiles politiely and continues to read her Better Homes and Gardens magazine. There's a TV but it's not on, so I pick up a copy of Metropolitan Home and sink back into the hard uncomfortable chair.

Just as I get into the magazine she calls my name and into the room I go. After some informal chit chat and name introductions she begins, "What is your birthdate?, How old are you? What age were you when you first got pregnant? When was your last period? Do you have any tenderness in your breasts? Does breast cancer run in your family?"

After she verifies my information, she tells me to slip my right arm out of the gown. "Ok, she says, we'll start on the right. I will move you into position" And with that the Mammogram has begun. "You'll feel some compression on your breast" Translation: your breast is about to be as flat as a frisbee and feel as if a large elephant is stepping on it. "Now, we'll repeat with the other side" Wow I think I may have died and gone to hell.

And so it begins...the journey to 40. This little trip includes enduring a mammogram to protect yourself from breast cancer. So now I wait and see. Oh lucky me.

Secrets

We all have something to hide..don't we? Now we can be free of the burden of the nasty little secret that we are harboring and still remain a secret. Interested? Then check out http://postsecrets.com . Here you'll find secrets mailed in by people like you and me, who wish to tell their secret and be free of the burden of carrying it around and still remain a secret. Very cool site. You'll be hooked.

Oh Hello...Sears called and wants their drapes back.

Dirty Laundry

Okay I admit it! I am weak. Not physically but I gave up on the washer and fixing it and decided to just buck up (and bucking up) is what I did and got a new one. I guess somewhere in the abyss of my mind I was just preparing for the day I could get a new washer with the pathetic excuse of a stripped screw.

Anyway the "washer" arrives Friday when I can be home to accept it into my home. In the meantime, the old one is sitting half in and half out blocking the hallway. Sort of taunting me or just reminding me of the agravation that it caused me. I felt somewhat of a failure because I was unable to "fix" my problem when I was reminded that most women and some men would not have gotten as far as I did. Oh, kudos to me! Whatever.

My own sister and her husband made a bet...Sis: Went with the side that I would fix it.
Bro-in-law: She'll get a new one. Sorry SIS but thanks for the love!

So Friday night holds a lot of fun in it for me...doing laundry in the new machine. Settle down!

Oh, but don't feel too sorry for me because I'll "sex" it up a little by watching the season premiere of Nip/Tuck on Tivo. Now... settle down!

Frustrated!

Aahhh to be a single woman...Wait, I am a single woman. A very frustrated single woman. Not for the reasons you may be thinking! My frustration comes from the things I am inapt at doing, laying ceramic tile, rewiring an electrical outlet and putting a new belt on my washing machine!

Now, I can install a ceiling fan and use a cordless drill for many tasks around the house but there are just some things I can not do and this frustrates me. It also frustrates me that I have to pay someone (a pretty penny) to do these things for me. So when the belt on my washing machine "smoked" up my house this morning I decided to tuff it up and do it myself. After looking at the manual on line (yes on line no longer a "book") I went to work only to find that one of the screws that secures the front panel of the damn (did I say that) machine is stripped. Yes, I have a stripped screw and there's nothing pornographic about it.

Needless to say the job is now on hold until I can figure out a way to remove a stripped screw or give in and find a guy to help. In my desperate attempt to solve this dilemma I even went as far as typing tripped screw into the search engine and guess what came back...No not porno ads, much to my dismay but actual tools for this problem. However, The Home Depot doesn't have
them. So here I was, blonde girl in a white (which I can still wear after labor day) suit in the tools section at The Home Depot. One might think, hhmm potential place to find a date, again ONE MIGHT THINK that but not me. I was on a mission to get me the right tools for the job...again we are talking about fixing my washing machine.

So when I got home this evening I decided to give it a rest and pick it up sometime tomorrow or the next day. Who am I kidding, I have to finish doing my laundry.

Before I tackle the task... I decided to read the entertainment news and all over the place it's splitsville...Renee and Kenny after 6 months of marriage -DIVORCE-they decided they had different objectives in mind for the marriage? " Zellweger and Chesney released a third statement, saying that "the miscommunication of the objective of their marriage at the start is the only reason for this annulment. Renee and Kenny value and respect each other and are saddened that their different objectives prevent the success of this marriage." I can't even begin to speculate.

Tori Spelling (who I am not a huge fan) and her husband of one year-DIVORCE! Which is funny because she just was the host ofE'ss best celebrity weddings tooting her own horn and wedding!

Aniston and Pitt? Hands in the air...Who's got a "Team Aniston" T-shirt?

I read the other day that a man running for a leadership position in one of the foreign countries wants to ban marriage and make it so no one can "get married". People would just live together. This may solve a lot of financial issues and put a few lawyers out of practice but hey is the way it is now any better?

Maybe I am better off to be single and frustrated (in so many ways) :) then married for a month, six months or a year and need toseparatee because "we had miscommunicated the objectives of the reason we were getting married." Hey, what's love got to do with it?

Well, I give them some credit at least they realized they made a "mistake" and are getting on with their lives. As Jennifer Aniston puts it...about her impending divorce, the former Friends star said, "I am doing so well," and urged others to follow her lead by moving forward. "You want to say, 'Come on people. Turn the page.'" As for the biggest lesson she's learned from the divorce?" Living in the moment, Aniston said. "I'm not sitting dwelling about the past or stressing or fretting about something in the future."

So Live, Love, and move on. Life's too short.

Aaaaahhhhhhh

In the aftermath of Katrina this is so damn sweet. Goes to show that dolphins can be smarter than some human beings.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/9343538/

Seperated at Birth?

When Harry Met Sally....

Can men and women be friends? This was the topic of conversation yesterday between some of us. Tom of course said no, Em said yes and I , well, I just shut my mouth. Tom's theory, the motivation of a guy to be friends with a woman is to sleep with her. He also added that once a guy is labeled a "friend" he never loses the label. She can think he is the "bomb" yet why won't she have a relationship with him? Here's where I jumped in with "because she doesn't find him attractive" Sometimes the truth hurts.

I tried the friendship thing once or twice with a guy. The "real world" version is that it doesn't work unless; 1. One of you is gay 2. One (even better if both) has no sexual chemisty toward the other. And you can't be friends with someone you have been involved with either intimately or emotionally unless items number 1 & 2 apply. Why? One of the two of you will misinterpret the "friendship"

It turns into a flow chart. You start here but if you feel this way you go this direction. If you feel another way you follow this direction. But all arrows lead you to the same outcome.

The "movie" version is that you both realize that your best friend is the person you want to be with emotionally and intimately. The real life version....????

I Remember...

I just finished watching the documentary on the Discovery channel of "The Flight that Fought Back". As I wipe the tears from my eyes, my heart still feels the horrors of that day. It was a beautiful warm sunny day when I awoke to this unbelievable tragedy unfolding before my eyes. The moment I turned on the TV I witnessed the crashing of the second plane into the tower. As I sat in disbelief my mind could not comprehend what my eyes had just saw. I went through the day as if in a mental coma. I was awake but unable to comprehend what was happening. I believe I slept with the TV on for two days straight falling in and out of sleep awakening to new developments and asking myself why over and over.

As I watched this documentary tonight my heart still aches for the loss that so many suffered that day. I also realize that life is so precious. We go about each day and have no idea if we will be here tomorrow. Did you tell someone that you love them today? Did you spend some time with someone you love? If you love someone do they know it? Did you do something that made you smile and brought some happiness into your heart?

I need to remind myself that everyday is a gift. The many people who lost their lives will always be remembered by their family, friends and those of us who never even knew them. Because although they may be strangers- they are us - and on that day we all lost.

Crazy

How crazy is this.....
Student sees dead father in DUI crash photos shown by police
ASSOCIATED PRESS KNOXVILLE, Tenn., Sept. 10 — A 12-year-old girl saw her father's remains in a gruesome photograph shown during a presentation by police warning teenagers about the dangers of drunk driving.
http://famulus.msnbc.com/famulusgen/ap09-10-200137.asp?t=apnew&vts=91020052029

Are we planning on eliminating all the fun?

Embryo may soon be created from two women
Britain grants scientists permission to embark on controversial research
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/9269062/

Plastered

Here is what remodeling feels like...

Sign says: "Good Start, but you've still got a ways to go."

During the holiday weekend the big bathroom remodeling project commenced. What was to be a simple job had turned into something slightly more complicated.

I had decided to change the floor to ceramic tile. However, I did not pick out the tile before the job began. Unbeknownst to me, tile is like cabinents, if you want something special they have to order it and it takes several weeks. Not going to work...need it today. So last Sunday I spent a great deal of the day traveling to 6 different tile stores, all those that were open, to look for tile. I came back with tile that all pretty much looked the same. After feeling somewhat defeated I finally chose a tile I liked. That decision did not come easy, and required me to call over a friend for a fourth opinion. Now ..Unfortunately I have the job of returning LOTS of tile.

Things I now own: A Sawhorse.

I may have mentioned that I decided to put radiant heat under the tiled floor. It kicks ass! I love stepping out of the shower onto a warm floor. It also makes sitting at the toilet somewhat comfortable...hehehehe

Now the cabinents, issues there. Love them, however they did have their flaws and the door to the linen tower was put on the wrong side at the manufacturers. I come to find out that this is NORMAL. You have to switch it upon installation and putty up the holes. Nice! Needless to say I MF'ed the dealer over the telephone line about his lack of communication on this etc..

We were only able to install three of the four cabinents because the countertop is not ready. It won't be ready until the sink comes in which is another couple of weeks.

My brother in law had to redo the plumbing which was an unexpected job. Apparently I did a not so good job of measuring where the pipes would line up with the backs of the cabinents. I was slightly off...which required some re-routing of pipe, done at about 8pm-1am in the morning (on a weeknight).

More things I now own: A blow torch..and getting to know the employees at Lowe's on a first name basis.

At this point, the ceiling needs repainted because when the walls were repainted the ceiling got splashed with color. I tried to touch it up but the ceiling paint is much whiter than the ceiling... so now I have white spots all over. As it is I would rather not mess with it but it needs to be done. My friend H. is going to come over and help with. He is a painting pro and it helps that he runs/owns a trade magazine for paint dealers.

I can shower and use the toilet but that's all for now. It'll be another month before things get finished. I now have the responsibility to find a new mirror for the wall and a new light, since they both are too big for the new design. In addition, I have some additional sanding and painting to do on the holes that were made in the wall for the new electrical boxes that were put in.

Now own...a new drill and the first name of the lady who works the returns desk at Lowe's

While all of this was going on, I realized that I am somewhat deficient in the home improvement gene. My own sister can change out a faucet and lay tile! So while I watched and learned, I secretly wished that I would meet a man who is skilled in this area. Oh! the projects we (he) could do. But alas, I haven't yet so I guess I will be going out and buying myself a couple of Do It Yourself books on plumbing, wiring etc...Because there might be a man secretly wishing he would meet a woman skilled in this area...Oh the projects we could do.

HeeHeeHee...

It's all about me- Part 2

The holiday weekend has been quite a blur with my bathroom remodeling project the focus. Between the little things that have come up (we are out of that tile) and the occasional disageements between my visiting family members-I have taken to drinking. Yeah that's right, I went to the store and picked up some margherita mix and some Cuervo Gold and mixed me up the drink of happiness. I pretty much drank a whole pitcher myself on Sunday. Then I went to bed or was it I passed out?

I am feeling a little melancholy. Therefore I don't think I will try to write anything particularly witty or profound-but do I ever? So here are some more things you may not know, about me.

21- I love tortilla chips with shredded cheese melted on them. I could eat these everyday and have done so. Somtimes I add salsa and sour cream.

22- I like to sleep on flannel sheets even in the summer. MMmm soft.

23- I must have well pedicured feet- with my toes polished and my feet all nice and soft. Although I am personally "grossed out" by feet which may be why I need to have mine meticulous.

24-I love a dirty martini made with Ketel One vodka and bleu cheese stuffed olives. Got to give props to D. for turning me on to those.

25- I call my cat Boo-Boo Kitty, pookie, stinky and baby- but her real name is Samantha.

26- I have about 15 different shampoos and conditioners- I switch on and off. Don't even ask me for a count on hair/beauty products.

27-I don't enjoy cooking-so I don't cook. It's something that is no fun doing for one so I don't-however there are a few dishes I can make that are de-lish!

28- I think slow, soft kisses are so hot!

29-I am a visual person. If I see it I am able to remember it.

30- I love the way some men smell-by this I mean the cologne they wear mixed with their scent
31- I like surprises-good ones mind you.

32- I keep a journal and find writing in it to be very therapeutic.

33-I like to flirt.

34-I love to wear high heels. I find them comfortable.

35- I like going to the pool and sitting in the sun or laying in the water on a raft - and sleeping out in the sun with a breeze blowing on me.

36- I am a romantic at heart.

37-I quit smoking over two years ago. Yeah for me!

38-I had part of my liver removed in April -but hey! it grows back.

39-I am assertive but not offensive.

40-My new favorite number-The age I will be on Christmas of this year.